Political Ambition Inversely Related to Musical Integrity

A recent study by TheMusicSnob.com’s “Data Analysis and Electioneering Center” has revealed a strong inverse correlation between “musical integrity” and “political ambition”, which you can see from the graph below:

Many in the music community are not terribly surprised, given the historical association between teen pop and political campaigning. Richard Nixon was known for his New Kids on the Block impressions, and Andrew Jackson once auditioned for American Idol.

Working Class Heroes

More recently, Hillary Clinton was seen at an open mic in an Irish bar, singing limericks and identifying with the working class. And word has it that the McCain campaign is filming a new music video for Madonna’s 1986 hit “Papa Don’t Preach”, featuring Sarah Palin’s pregnant daughter.

The Threshold of Delusions

One odd result of the statistical analysis is what they are calling the “Threshold of Delusions” (see the graph). This is the point at which a politician becomes convinced that his actions are divinely guided (meaning, God is telling him what to do). This point marks a brief upward blip on the “musical integrity” axis, as it is usually accompanied by a sudden fondness for Gospel music and Gregorian chant, which are pretty cool.

If you’d like to see the horrors of politics made plain through the humorous wisdom of John Stewart, take a trip to this link:

Oh The Horror

The only thing this really has to do with music is that it reminds us how lucky we are to be obsessed with music, instead of spending our lives lying to people and religiously misleading the public. Enjoy your weekends and sing us a song to keep us warm…